If you’ve ever watched Younger and wondered whether Josh’s tattooed arms are the real deal, you’re not alone. The actor behind that character, Nico Tortorella, has spent the past decade building a career that refuses to fit into a single box. This article pulls together verified facts about their gender identity, relationship structure, sobriety journey, and the ink that blurred the line between character and creator.

Born: July 30, 1988 · Known for: Younger, Scream 4 · Gender identity: Non-binary, uses they/them pronouns · Relationship status: Married to Bethany C. Meyers, polyamorous · Sobriety: 11+ years, uses kratom · Tattoos on Younger: Partially real, partially makeup

Quick snapshot

1Confirmed facts
2What’s unclear
  • No verified public list of past dating partners
  • Exact role of kratom in their sobriety plan beyond personal testimony
3Timeline signal
  • 2011: Appeared in Scream 4
  • 2015–2021: Starred on Younger
  • 2022: Married Bethany C. Meyers
  • 2023: Became a parent
4What’s next

Eight key facts about Nico Tortorella, drawn from verified sources:

Label Value
Full name Nico Tortorella
Date of birth July 30, 1988
Age 36 (as of 2025)
Place of birth Chicago, Illinois
Known for Actor, model
Notable works Younger, Scream 4
Gender identity Non-binary (Pride Source)
Spouse Bethany C. Meyers (married 2022)

What is Nico Tortorella’s gender?

Nico Tortorella pronouns and identity

Nico Tortorella identifies as non-binary and uses they/them pronouns. A 2021 interview with Pride Source (LGBTQ+ news outlet) described them as a “queer nonbinary actor, activist, and author.”

The upshot

Tortorella’s public identity as non-binary means they challenge the Hollywood mold of straight, cisgender leading roles — and often play characters that don’t reflect that identity on screen.

Public statements about gender

Tortorella has spoken openly about their gender journey. In a 2019 interview with ABC News (national broadcaster), they discussed being referred to with they/them pronouns. The same report noted that their marriage to Bethany C. Meyers was described as polyamorous.

The implication: Tortorella uses these labels not as rigid boxes but as tools to help others understand their lived experience.

Is Nico Tortorella in a polyamorous relationship?

Nico Tortorella’s marriage to Bethany C. Meyers

Nico Tortorella married fitness entrepreneur Bethany C. Meyers in 2022. The couple has described their relationship as polyamorous. In a 2018 Women’s Health (women’s lifestyle magazine) piece, Meyers explained that the poly label helped others understand their long-term arrangement.

What is polyamory to Nico?

Both partners have emphasized that polyamory does not mean a lack of commitment. An episode of the Audible podcast Polyamory, Pronouns featuring the couple explored how they navigate multiple loving relationships with intentionality (Audible (podcast platform)).

The pattern: Tortorella and Meyers use public conversations to demystify polyamory, framing it as a relationship structure built on honesty rather than convention.

Is Nico Tortorella sober?

Nico Tortorella’s sobriety journey

Tortorella has maintained sobriety from alcohol for over 11 years. In a 2024 appearance on the podcast Work in Progress with Sophia Bush, they discussed a decade of sobriety and using creativity as an outlet (iHeart (podcast network)).

Kratom and 11 years of sobriety

In January 2026, PinkNews (LGBTQ+ media outlet) reported that Tortorella credited the plant kratom with helping them stay sober. Kratom is a tropical tree leaf with opioid-like effects that is legal in the U.S. but unregulated by the FDA. The report noted the substance has both advocates and critics in recovery communities.

The trade-off

Kratom may support Tortorella’s sobriety, but its lack of regulation means anyone considering it faces an uncertain safety profile — a personal choice that clinicians often caution against without medical oversight.

What is kratom and why does Nico Tortorella use it?

Kratom (Mitragyna speciosa) is a plant native to Southeast Asia. Users report it helps manage cravings and withdrawal from opioids or alcohol. Tortorella has credited it with their 11-year sobriety, as reported by PinkNews.

Why this matters: Tortorella’s public endorsement of kratom places them at the center of a debate between harm-reduction advocates and medical bodies that warn about addiction risks and contamination.

Are Josh’s tattoos real on Younger?

Josh’s tattoos on Younger: facts and fiction

Josh, Tortorella’s character on Younger (2015–2021), is a heavily tattooed brewer. According to Pride Source, some of the tattoos are Tortorella’s own real ink, while others were applied by makeup artists for the show.

Nico Tortorella’s real tattoos

The actor has multiple real tattoos that production incorporated into the character’s look. The exact breakdown of real vs. applied has not been fully documented by the show’s official sources, but interviews confirm the mix.

The catch: Because Tortorella is a non-binary actor playing a straight, tattooed man, the physical tattoos became a bridge between their real body and the fictional role — a subtle layer of authenticity in an otherwise crafted character.

Timeline: Key milestones in Nico Tortorella’s life and career

Bottom line: Tortorella’s timeline shows parallel tracks of a rising acting career and an evolving public identity — from Midwest-born actor to non-binary, polyamorous parent in the spotlight.
  • July 30, 1988 — Born in Chicago, Illinois.
  • 2011 — Appeared in Scream 4.
  • 2015–2021 — Starred as Josh in TV Land’s Younger.
  • 2019 — Ended The Love Bomb podcast.
  • 2022 — Married Bethany C. Meyers.
  • 2023 — Became a parent.

What we know and what we don’t

Confirmed facts

  • Nico Tortorella is non-binary (Pride Source).
  • They are sober for 11 years and use kratom (PinkNews).
  • They are married to Bethany C. Meyers in a polyamorous relationship (ABC News).
  • Josh’s tattoos on Younger are a mix of real and applied (Pride Source).

What’s unclear

  • Specific dating history before Meyers is not publicly documented.
  • Full medical context around Tortorella’s kratom use beyond their own statements is unavailable.

The gap between what Tortorella has confirmed and what remains anecdotal is narrow but meaningful — their public candor leaves fewer unknowns than for most public figures.

Quotes from Tortorella and Meyers

“I am non-binary. I use they/them pronouns. It’s taken me a long time to feel comfortable saying that out loud.”

— Nico Tortorella, in a 2021 interview with Pride Source

“Polyamory is just another way of being honest about love. The label helps people understand, but it doesn’t define us.”

— Bethany C. Meyers, speaking to Women’s Health in 2018

“Kratom is the reason I’m still sober. I know it’s controversial, but it works for me.”

— Nico Tortorella, as quoted by PinkNews in 2026

“Sobriety isn’t a destination; it’s a daily practice. I use creativity as my outlet.”

— Nico Tortorella, on the Work in Progress podcast (iHeartRadio)

Tortorella’s willingness to speak openly about identity, relationships, and recovery has made them an influential figure for fans navigating similar paths. For anyone following their story — whether because of Younger or because of their advocacy — the takeaway is the same: authenticity, for Tortorella, is not a marketing tactic; it’s a hard-won daily choice.

Additional sources

polyinthemedia.blogspot.com, goodmorningamerica.com, tiktok.com, podcasts.apple.com, reddit.com, tiktok.com

Readers interested in Nico Tortorella’s gender and sobriety journey can find additional context in a companion piece at Nico Tortorellas gender and sobriety journey.

Frequently asked questions

Does Nico Tortorella have children?

Yes, Nico Tortorella and Bethany C. Meyers became parents in 2023. Details about the child have been kept largely private.

Where is Nico Tortorella from?

Nico Tortorella was born in Chicago, Illinois, on July 30, 1988.

What movies has Nico Tortorella been in?

Tortorella appeared in Scream 4 (2011) and has other film credits listed on IMDb (movie database). Their most prominent screen role was on the TV series Younger.

What does Nico Tortorella do for a living?

They are an actor, model, author, and activist. They hosted the podcast The Love Bomb and write about identity and sobriety.

Is Nico Tortorella on Instagram?

Yes, they maintain a public Instagram account (@nicotortorella) where they share personal updates, advocacy, and professional work.

How did Nico Tortorella and Bethany C. Meyers meet?

The couple met in New York City through mutual friends. They have been together since the early 2010s and married in 2022.

Why does Nico Tortorella use kratom?

Tortorella has publicly stated that kratom helped them maintain 11 years of sobriety from alcohol. They credit the plant as a personal harm-reduction tool.

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